Free Lunch?

Ruth: they taste better when they are free
Richard: everything tastes better when its free
Ruth: everything
Richard: even vaginas
Ruth: :D
Richard: :D I'm disgusting
Ruth: :D
Ruth: I had no answer for that
Ruth: I always have to pay for the ones I get

Shelves and Cake

Richard: guess how much i paid
Ruth: hmmm..... R900?
Richard: R950
Richard: spot on
Richard: not bad hey
Ruth: very good price
Richard: i was impressed
Ruth: and there will always be a use for that
Ruth: its like shelves - somewhere they can be put
Richard: always
Ruth: speaking of shelves -- me need more
Richard: one can never have enough
Ruth: true
Richard: i fucking love shelves
Ruth: :D
Ruth: fucking LOVE them
Richard: :D
Richard: we are so weird
Ruth: yeah.... at least we have each other
Ruth: and shelves and cake

Ruth's Rusty Seduction Techniques

Ruth: I will say to him, “come over , and be dazzled by my amazing culinary skills”
Ruth: (hot dogs and popcorn)
Ruth: “these hot dogs are going to take a minute or two -- make yourself comfortable, take off your shirt if you like”
Ruth :D
Ruth: smooooth
Richard: “and your pants”
Richard: “i know its hot”
Ruth: dont want any tomato sauce on them
Richard: “oh i seem to dropped a hot dog on your lap………let me pick it up using my mouth”

The Mom Express

Richard: i'll ask my mom to make you lunch and send it to CPT via speed mail
Richard: LOL
Ruth: hahahahahaha
Ruth: make it an avo sandwich… on super soft bread….with a green salad
Richard: :D
Richard: ok will do
Richard: i will tell her
Ruth: let it stand overnight before sending it…so its nice and fresh
Richard: ok..yes boss
Richard: will tell her
Richard: i will say: "your other daughter wants a sandwich made for her"
Ruth: hahahahahahahahahaha
Ruth: i will send a message – “thanks mom, but maybe next time deliver it yourself, it’s a nice touch”
Richard: LOLOLOLOLOLOL
Ruth: can you say -- P*es klap!!

The Discovery of Every Problem's Solution

Ruth: curry and rice for lunch
Ruth: fuck... thats alot of starch, will have to run around my block
Ruth: :D
Richard: :D
Richard: no ways, practice for italy!
Ruth: hahahahhaahha!!
Ruth: just add wine and all will be forgiven?
Richard: yes- the acid nature of wine dissolves the fat
Ruth: amazing discovery
Ruth: and it causes the person to want to have sex.. to tone the body... wine really is the ultimate weight loss tonic
Richard: totally - its like amazing
Ruth: and cheap
Ruth: so the only side effect is bad skin -- so what?
Ruth: totally worth it
Ruth: eventually you wont even notice
Richard: yes, the more you drink...the less you care
Ruth: :D
Ruth: so weight loss, fat burner, and confidence booster... also a great component for better conversation
Richard: GEESH
Richard: its like the answer to all lifes questions!
Richard: no spiritual quests for us, weve found it
Ruth: its true what they say --- the answer really is RIGHT there in front of you
Richard: like frekkin WOW
Ruth: i am going to go and stock up - an investment in a happier me
Richard: me too
Ruth: so what if my teeth go purple and i start smelling bad? there will always be a song in my heart!! LOL
Richard: exactly -- you will be happy
Richard: and if you arent you just add another bottle
Ruth: hahahahahahahaha
Ruth: voila!!!
Ruth: happy or passed out ---- oblivious either way
Ruth: the world would be my cradle

Lunch Dilemma

Ruth: hmmm
Ruth: i think our chef is on crack
Ruth: he has started a new thing where the buffet gets set out, but you have to choose a meal group and only dish those things together
Ruth: right....
Ruth: the groups are ridiculous
Richard: hahahahaha
Richard: what are the groups?
Ruth: an example of one for today:
Ruth: Spaghetti bolognaise, rice, potato, veg
Richard: hahahahah
Richard: thats random
Ruth: i know
Ruth: does he want me to commit carbocide??

The Italian Dream

Ruth: we have to go to rome
Ruth: please... can we
Richard: yes
Richard: as long as we eat loads of pizza
Ruth: hmm.. i can do that
Ruth: agreed
Richard: and ice cream
Ruth: and pasta
Ruth: infused with flavour
Richard: and have loads of sex with as many italians as possible
Ruth: I'M IN
Richard: YAY
Ruth: when do we leave???
Richard: tomorrow? i need to buy condoms
Ruth: i need to stock up on elasticated pants
Richard: and those chubbie granny pants
Ruth:(nod)
Richard: :D
Ruth: will each need two seats coming back
Ruth: hahahahaha
Ruth: and donuts to sit on
Richard: ahahaaaAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
Ruth: :D
Richard: or....
Richard: we wont come back
Ruth: ..
Richard: marry italians
Ruth: YAY!
Richard: rich italians
Richard: before we get fat
Ruth: yes
Ruth: and their chefs can make us fat
Richard: excellente
Richard: (im practicing)
Ruth: atraversiamo
Ruth: !!
Richard: wow, thats good
Ruth: now need to watch that movie about 45 more times to get the rest
Richard: LOL
Richard: OR buy those tapes
Richard: chow bella
Ruth: (clap) saltimbocca
Richard: giva me somea spaghetti
Ruth: i needa some vino
Richard: man....were practically italian already
Ruth: only cooler
Richard: thats a given